Break!

A lot had happened but I just want to vent out what my feelings are now. I don't know why I feel disheartened. And I'm hating the fact that perhaps my laziness is getting the best out of me. There are a lot of things that are on my shoulder now but I just want to drop them and be a ordinary person. All this fuzz is making me crazy! As of the moment, I enjoy my time alone and my personal space. Not in the gear of doing things that doesn't concern me directly. But I'm also aware that if I will drop these things it will have an effect on me in the future so I feel like I'm in a conundrum.

I'm not a big fan of sacrifices. Doing things that I'm not passionate about. All my life I'm driven by passion and I do things because of it. But yeah, sometimes things are not on your own terms. I just want to be alone with my books and a couple of good movies and tv series.

Life would be so much better without these people who expects so much from me. If things would be simple as it is. And that we are in our best state. Free of mediocrity.

Where do I fit in?

Where can you find the place where you will fit in best? Who can say to you that you shall take this path and not the otherwise? How can this crucial choice affect everyone around you? This is a very tough question that I will try to talk about somehow. I came across this question AGAIN in my class today and though I know for a fact what I want to be in my life what bothers me is that there are some people who are still not in the same predicament as I am. I’m not trying to boast here or something but what I’m trying to say is it also affects us in an indirect way when you make a decision that will place you in a field where you don’t best fit. It is an old issue about the nursing students that are taking the course because they were forced to by their parents or lured by the “opportunity” outside the country. As one of my professors used to say “Sayang yung mga utak na pinilit magnursing. Pwede sana sila maging magaling na abogado o mambabatas sa talino nila na yan” We can establish a premise here that there are endless possibilities of what ifs with these people and how they could have helped our country in a more effective way. 

If you happened to watch the movie 3 Idiots (a 2009 Bollywood film) one of Rancho’s friend was forced by his parents to take Engineering when in fact he is a TALENTED photographer. He could have use those times that he spend in engineering school to enhance his photography skills but instead he wasted it studying something that he is not passionate about. We are all trying to find our place where we will be a functional member of the society and aiming to be effective. We should seek what we do best and pursue it. What are we passionate about and strive for it. Sometimes we are just in the wrong track doing things that are meaningless and wasting our time doing something we don’t need to do. This is exactly the problem why here in the Philippines is far from an ideal society. Though we can never have an ideal society but it doesn’t mean we stop trying to become one. Here comedians can be politicians, nursing graduates are in the call centers, political science graduates can teach sociology and other fields that a lot of wrong people are in it. 

I’m aware that we are highly influenced by the social media culture in our time today where you can see what everyone is doing with just a click. It is also by this culture that we think in such a way that we seek what we can get and what we think we deserve. It is all about us and what we are entitled to have. It made us forget that every right has a responsibility with it. We are responsible to what our country is becoming. There is no one to blame but us to what is happening in the Philippines. So what are we trying to do to contribute to our country? Are we on the field that we think we can contribute effectively? Of course some would argue that it is the practicality that they are doing the things they are doing right now. But is it really the reason or we just don’t have the guts to make a stand? I’m sure that you don’t want to see the old gray haired you telling to yourself that you live a life of practicality not making a dent on history.

Courage

Courage is not the absence of fear; Courage is not becoming a slave of fear.We often think or say that someone is courageous because they have the guts, they are strong and has no fear. Are you like that? Or do you wish to be like that? I remember when i was a child i have no fear. I do things that i want to do without having second thoughts on it. When i was asked to participate on a certain competition i don't say NO. Never did I when i was in elementary. Then i went to highschool, i must say that my ego just became higher and nowhere to be found in the ground. Also because i know in myself no one can oppose me for what i believe, what i know, and what i can do. There are no one who can beat me down and my morale is that invincible.

When i move up to college and i transferred house. I was still a air-headed person. But maybe because of the circumstances that made me doubt myself? During my early years of my college life i was emotionally down and fragile. I was not prepared from the succeeding events and i have this fear of failure and destruction. I was way beyond my comfort zone and many things happened that made me weak and fearful. It was a long and tiring journey that time. I think i have signs of depression that time and no one is capable of helping me.

God knows how long it is but i recovered. I faced my demons and overcame my fear. I learn to be independent and took full responsibility of my future. There goes my fear of becoming nothing, fear that i may not be able to sustain myself for everyday living and the list goes on. But here i am now, studying my course where my passion is and trying to rebuild myself again. Whatever you might be afraid of right now, whatever is hindering you from being the best and happy, whatever it is always keep in mind to take courage and go for it! For you shall not be a slave of fear!

Democracy Is In Our Hands

Before i sleep i want to write a couple more things here. It is so random that i want to tackle about democracy at this time. As Plato once said "The problem with democracy is that decisions are made by people without knowledge". Together with this I once read in my Facebook news feed that the Philippines' politician and government leaders these days are nothing but the tip of the iceberg. These leaders got elected because this is how the Filipinos think and rationalize. Though there are some exceptions because there is also a percentage of citizens that are educated and has a sensible opinions about political issues and economic need of the Philippines. You may also say right now to me that there is a widespread anomaly in every election and results are not that credible. But let's be realistic that no matter how big the influence of a certain politician or government personality, despite of their efforts you cannot outnumber the votes of majority of the people. Maybe it can help them a notch to gain a comfortable position but still this is subject to debate.

We always want democracy, freedom as others may say, we want to be autonomous and sovereign but are we really up for it? I'm fully aware that there is no perfect government but should not dismiss the notion of improvement. We should not settle for mediocrity and be passive about these things. As democracy in its sense has a big reliance on its people and we should not neglect that. Our goal is that we should aim to educate our people and eradicate ignorance. Before poverty, debts and territory disputes we should first educate our people and awareness to this things will follow much more a better understanding of these issues.

Today, September 21, 2012 we are remembering the Martial Law that once tasted by our country and because of this people became suddenly awakened from their slumber and revolted; I honestly believe this is because they cannot afford to ignore this anymore for they are directly affected by this that time. People across the globe recognized us because of the succeeding events following the Proclamation 1081. But this doesn't last that long and the all of a sudden the patriotism died. This should not be a temporal; the passion to learn and be held responsible for our own democracy should be reminded to every Filipino every day. The efforts of some private sectors and companies in igniting the Filipino Spirit in anyway they can shall not be put in vain. If we all want to be truly free and sovereign, we should take the responsibility in our shoulders and every single Filipino should also do the same.

Believer

As I've promised, I will try my best to update my blog everyday. :) So after writing that post yesterday I was trying to think my past thoughts that I would like to write here in my blogsite. Some of them are still here in my phone so I will attempt to unearth them together with the thoughts that comes with it. Because I only save titles of my ideas and not the whole story. So I shall refresh my brain now. Hahahaha!

Okay to start i found this in my drafts "And the trouble is if you don't risk anything, you are risking even more". I think i heard this from a sunday message. Which appeals to me because I'm that kind of person who is a risk taker. This kind of attitude develops in me since i became independent at a very young age. So I've learned to take a risk since i feel that there is nothing to lose in trying. Even though in reality you are gambling a part of you at some instances. The thing is a lot of people are afraid to get out of their comfort zones and made themselves comfortable to what they have or what they are at the present time. But that will not work for me. I know and honestly believe that there a lot of things to chase in this life and a lot of wonderful events that are just waiting for us to unveil. I'm always a believer of good things, of good life and optimism runs through my veins.

From all of the things that happened to me and the things that I've overcome in life, I can say that there is more to life than miseries and sorrows. Never ever think that you had enough of everything because there is a lot in store for all of us. So take the risk and seize the day! :)